1 Mudal

Sisters Relationship Essay

My Sister Essay

MY SISTER

Elder brothers or sisters are a great inspiration to their younger brothers and sisters, and that is what my elder sister Mona is to me. I have one younger brother Shekhar, and one elder sister Mona. We all live together with my parents and grandma. Both of my parents work all week, so my elder sister takes care of us. I always look up to her as an ideal, and I know whenever I will need her she will be there for me. She is my inspiration, my sister, and my best friend. I love her and admire her because she is loving, caring, and intelligent.

        My sister is a person with a big heart. Her love for the family, makes everyone loves her. My grandma is really old and unable to walk by herself. My sister Mona takes care of our grandma by giving her medication on time, checking her blood pressure, and keeping track of her physical record. One time my grandma had a heart attack and we thought we would lose her but my sister took her to the hospital and stayed with her all night. Next day when grandma came back home she said that, "She is alive because of Mona, her love and hard work kept her alive." She even takes care of our younger brother Shekhar, who is always mischievous. She makes sure that he does not spend too much time in playing and finishes his homework on time. She also likes helping disabled people, and that is why she volunteers at a rehab institution by our home. People at rehab love her so much that they wait for her on weekends because...

Loading: Checking Spelling

0%

Read more

Personal Narrative- The Day My Sister Left for College

799 words - 3 pages Personal Narrative- The Day My Sister Left for College I had woken up extra early that morning to watch it all happen. To watch part of my life that had been ever so dominant disappear in a small gold 96’ Saturn. I watched it carefully, not thinking that these few moments would be our last, but that they would be the last that we were in some way equal. The day that my big sister drove away to college was the day my life changed. For the...

This is Thematic Analysis of 2 novels "Rocket Boys" and "Sister of My Heart".

713 words - 3 pages Thematic Analysis of Rocket Boys and

This is a creative writing piece about the differences between me and my sister entitled "Ten Years Later."

927 words - 4 pages Ten Years Later My older sister was always late in the mornings, and every day I waited on the couch next to the door, counting the hundreds of seconds until she was ready. I waited, dressed, with my bright pink backpack secured, my shoes tied, and my coat zipped. I watched her run around the...

"Uncle Molests Sister"

834 words - 3 pages Uncle molests sister, Aunt Betty wants him backMy Uncle Jeff and Aunt Betty have raised us for ten years. "Uncle Jeff is one of the most intelligent, loving, sensitive men I have ever met. However, the other day, my sister La Mona, reported that Uncle Jeff had started touched her inappropriately two years ago when she was only ten years old. She even admitted...

Naturalism in Sister Carrie.doc

4837 words - 19 pages Naturalism in Dreiser's Sister CarrieIntroductionTheodore Herman Albert Dreiser is one of the most outstanding realistic novelists in the history of American literature.His father's religious fanaticism, his mother's abiding tenderness...

Dear sister: EBay case

614 words - 2 pages Dear Tina,I see you are still my crazy sister. I love you anyway. However, from reading your proposal, I see that you once again are about to take a leap into unknown territory! This can surely land you in litigation. That's why I sent you the article about what happened between eBay and Bidder's...

BigBrother Big Sister

1612 words - 6 pages The main two types of mentoring are natural mentoring and planned mentoring. Natural mentoring occurs through friendship, collegiality, teaching, coaching, and counseling that is formed from un-constructed planning (Newman, 1990, p. 41). In contrast, planned mentoring occurs through structured programs in which mentors and participants are selected and matched through formal processes (Newman, 1990, p. 43). There are many different ways to...

Naturalism in Dreiser’s Sister Carrie

4837 words - 19 pages Naturalism in Dreiser's Sister CarrieIntroductionTheodore Herman Albert Dreiser is one of the most outstanding realistic novelists in the history of American literature.His father's religious fanaticism, his mother's abiding tenderness...

Symbolic sister of "The Metamorphosis"

1247 words - 5 pages Asmondy 1The End of a StoryAll good stories have an ending. But what is an ending? It is a termination. It is something that constitutes an end in the form of a conclusion to reach a logically, necessary end by reasoning (Webster 2000). In relation to a story it should have significance, and create some sort of closure. I believe the ending in The

The Little Sister: Beatrice d'Este

4862 words - 19 pages The Renaissance time period that lasted from the 14th century through the 16th century in Italy was known as an age of cultural rebirth and gave way to the introduction to humanist thinking while Medieval Europe transformed to Early Modern Europe. Humanism beliefs were the values that emphasized the agency of a human and stressed rationalism over faith. Humanists of the Renaissance tended to have great power in society and were highly...

Lyric interpretation - "Sister Golden Hair" by America

750 words - 3 pages For this lyric assignment, I chose the song “Sister Golden Hair” (released 1975) by America in their album Hearts . America is an English-American Folk-Rock band, originally composed of members Gerry Beckley, Dewey Bunnell, and Dan Peek. The...

'My sister and I are very close and we’re in touch a lot, yet it’s not an easy relationship’, says Marie, 36, of her sister Kate, who is two years older. ‘Often I’ll come off the phone feeling irritated and somehow dissatisfied. She manages to stir up emotions I don’t like, much more so than my friends or even my parents.’

A sibling relationship is likely to be the most enduring of our lives. The impact they have on our young and adult lives is enormous – they shape our history and our character, to a far greater extent than is usually acknowledged. The book Siblings In Development, edited by psychotherapists Vivienne Lewin and Belinda Sharp, states ‘siblings are not just second editions in relation to the parents, but have a profound importance in their own right. Relationships with siblings are ineradicably fixed in our psyches.’

Dr Terri Apter, child psychologist and author of The Sister Knot, says siblings ‘know you better than anyone. They may not always admire you, but they’ll always be intensely interested in you. If you ask a sibling to describe a parent, a friend or a sibling, it is the sibling that the child will describe with most sophistication and detail, in terms of their character and habits. This is why they are so significant.’

A study tracking almost 300 men from the late 1930s to the present day has shed new light on the importance of the sibling bond. According to the Harvard Study of Adult Development, 93 per cent of the men who were thriving at 65 had been close to a sibling in their early life. The study also reports that poorer relationships with siblings before the age of 20 could be a predictor of depression later in life, suggesting that the longer we can sustain close sibling relationships in adulthood, the more it can benefit and protect us emotionally.

Think about siblings around you, as well as your own, and consider how many of them really get on well, are truly happy, harmonious and close. Chances are they are few and far between. ‘Many of my clients get on badly with siblings, which could partly be down to the family dynamics of why they’re seeing me,’ says psychologist and therapist Martin Lloyd-Elliott. ‘Even so, anecdotally, I would say only a third of people I know report getting on well with siblings.’

Classic sibling dynamics often depend on what position we hold in the family. Elder children can often feel usurped when a younger one comes along and these feelings of rivalry can last well into adulthood. Many studies show that sisters tend to be closer to one another and that the worst age for bickering – regardless of gender – is when the elder child is 13 and the second-born is 10 years old. These dynamics are further complicated if stepsiblings are involved.

‘Constant competition may well shape our life script, leading us to filter every subsequent human interaction through the distorting prism of our original relationship with our siblings,’ says Lloyd-Elliott. ‘We’re all immersed in the unique culture of our particular home situation. Inevitably, any siblings who share that environment with us have an enormous influence on our overall experience of the world and we carry this forwards, often unconsciously, into our adult lives.’

In childhood it is often easier to express those negative feelings, but as we grow older, we try to suppress unpleasant feelings such as envy and anger. This is why so many siblings drift apart. ‘I was close to my brother as a young girl, but when I was nine I was sent to boarding school while he went to a day school,’ says Karen, 38. ‘I was so jealous of the fact that he stayed at home, but I also felt guilty and found it easier to keep my distance rather than admit this to him. It’s only now we’ve both got children that I feel able to see more of him.’ Meanwhile her brother remains unaware of his sister’s intense feelings.

Maybe this is why Lloyd-Elliott reports a certain confusion among many of the clients. They are aware that there is something amiss in their sibling relationships but unable to pinpoint why. ‘People speak to me rather wistfully of when they did get on well and are left thinking, “Where did that intense relationship go?”’ For those siblings who never got on as children, there is hope of a closer relationship as they grow older, says child-development specialist Elizabeth Hartley-Brewer. ‘Boys show jealousy and hatred in a much more physical way. It does seem to go on longer but, once they establish their adult identities, they feel they are respected,’ she says. ‘There can be a lot of pretence around sisters getting on, but beneath that there is more manipulation and nastiness than you get with brothers.’

The truth is that if you really didn’t get on with your siblings, there’s only one way to change the pattern in adulthood, which is determination and the will to work it out. ‘I remember one brother and sister who came to couple therapy because they felt it was so important to restore their relationship and I found that very moving,’ says Lloyd-Elliott. Watching my own children, I can see their bond is complex and intense, full of extreme displays of frustration, resentment but also intimacy and love. For their sake, I hope they can sustain that closeness in adulthood without the rivalry that seems so second nature to them now. You may compete with your siblings all your life, but you also love them and are deeply bonded to them. We need to accept that this is the most layered of our relationships and fight to keep it alive. The intimate history that siblings share can create tension, too.

‘I see a lot of people who still have difficulty being authentic with their siblings and find it very hard to talk to them,’ says psychologist Lucy Beresford. ‘Sometimes they feel a lot freer when they’re away from the nest. This is because many adult siblings don’t know each other as well as they did as children.’

Most of us change and carve out niches to differentiate ourselves from our family, so it can feel crushing to be constantly reminded of a former self that we’ve worked hard to leave behind. ‘It infuriates me that my elder sibling still sees me as this amusing but skittish younger sister,’ says Louisa, 34. ‘She even calls me Mia – her daughter’s name – by accident, which makes it abundantly clear how she views me.’

Part of forging mature sibling relationships means getting to know our siblings all over again. There are so many advantages of sibling relationships that can and should be nurtured. ‘You’re more likely to hold the same core values, a similar sense of origin and place, and an accumulation of shared crucial moments,’ says Lloyd-Elliott, ‘as well as family history on which to build.’

He believes sibling relationships can decline once we leave home because we don’t nurture them as we would romantic relationships and close friendships. Instead, we tend to be quite fatalistic about the way we behave with our siblings and assume that’s how it will always be. ‘They shouldn’t be something we take for granted,’ says Lloyd-Elliott. ‘Every relationship requires constant nourishment, as well as mutual respect. Your siblings are no exception.’

Leave a Comment

(0 Comments)

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *